The Life and Legacy of a Polio Survivor Mary Elizabeth "Betty" McKew
By Tim Gonnering
My mother, Mary Elizabeth McKew was born on August 5, 1920, in Green Bay, Wisconsin. She was only eight when she lost her young father, who died at just 30 years old. Shortly thereafter, she contracted Polio and was hospitalized for many months. Although we cannot be sure, we believe she was cared for at St. Vincents Hospital in Green Bay. Evidently, she had some kind of corrective surgery on her left foot to help her walk, leaving her with a high arched foot. My grandmother must have had to depend on family to support her two daughters.
Tim’s father, aunt & mother 1940.
Along with her sister Kathleen, my mother attended and graduated from St Mary’s Academy, PdC (Prairie Du Chien). It was run by sisters of Notre Dame, in Milwaukee. I wrote to the Catholic Diocese of La Crosse asking for her records. Sadly, they told me that the school closed in the late 70"s, and have no records.
Because at one time I had her class ring, I know that she graduated in 1938. I found an old picture showing her at her sister’s graduation two years later. I looked up pictures of St. Mary’s School to confirm that this was the place the picture was taken, and it was. I can only imagine my mother, aunt and their schoolmates going to class and walking around the picturesque campus that had a view of the mighty Mississippi river. By the time my mother attended the school, she had recovered from her bout with Polio. I believe that my mother and her sister Kathleen were sent to this private boarding school, not only to get a proper Catholic education, but to be quarantined from other people, living in fear of this dreaded disease.
Teenager Mary McKew
Sometime after my grandfather passed away, my grandmother met and eventually married Fred J. LeMieux. He worked at and was part owner of the LaPlant Chicken Hatchery in Green Bay. With plans to expand the business, Fred moved his new family to West Bend Wisconsin to open another La Plant Chicken Hatchery location. I believe the providence of God was at work here. West Bend is where my mother and father met when he was working at Jerry’s Super Service Station on Main Street. My father, Leo Gonnering was born in West Bend where he grew up and graduated from West Bend High School. Only in her teens when they fell in love, the military service came calling and he was drafted into the Army in 1941, serving in the 32nd Quartermaster Regiment. Initially he was scheduled to be sent to Europe but after the war broke out in the Pacific, he was sent to the Far East. He was among other things, awarded a service medal for the liberation of the Philippines.
Betty and Lee on their Wedding Day. November, 1945
This is a true love story. I am grateful for God giving her the strength to get through those four years he was gone. Had she not waited for him to come home, I would not be here to tell her story. My father was released from the army on October 2, 1945. Betty and “Lee”, as they were now known, were married a month later at St. Willebrord Catholic Church in Green Bay.
The newlyweds settled in West Bend. After working briefly at the chicken hatchery, my father became a building contractor. My mother quickly became a full time Mom, taking care of what would become quite the brood made up of five boys, born between 1947 and 1960. I was the last following Robert, James, Thomas and Gary. Our Mom had her hands full when her husband had a heart attack in his late 30"s. The heart attack slowed him down but he kept working, even though the doctor told him to go home and enjoy life as he was able. He was doing what he could to take care of his family and wasn’t home much.
The last Gonnering Family photo - 1960
My older brother Jim remembers that Dad was preparing for his real estate license when he passed away. It was February, 1961. I wasn’t even a year old. What was she to do? No husband, no job, no support and five children to raise. She needed to start over. When I was two, she told us we were going on vacation to visit with her sister and parents. We went to the Sunshine State, never to return to Wisconsin. We’ll never know if that was her intention all along. Clearly since they were much older than me, my mother’s decision to stay in Florida was much harder on my 4 older brothers than it was on me. They had friends and girlfriends that they never got to see again.
Upon arrival in Madeira Beach, Fla, we stayed with my grandparents. I can’t imagine what it was like for them to have six people move into their house! We stayed there until my mother was able to purchase a home nearby.
She remarried in August of 1966. He was a widower, nearing retirement age, who sold his home and moved in with us. This marriage did not last. They were divorced in 1970. My mother never remarried.
Even though she had challenges, had a very thin left leg and walked with a limp, my mother had an active life. After the divorce, she began to work as a caregiver for seniors in the area. She would visit them, take them shopping and sometimes sit with them over night while they were sick.
Five Gonnering Boys -1962
She played in a bridge club, did ceramics, stitched needlepoint, and loved to do crossword puzzles. When I was about 10, I remember that we used a large dining room table as a ping pong table. She would play with us, but she had one rule, "you cannot spike it on me . . . ". She would shoot baskets with us in front of the house and loved the beach. Many times, she drove us to the beach and let us play in the sand as she would watch the sunset.
She was outspoken and would not let anyone boss her around. I do not know if my brothers agree with me, but she had a similar personality, along with the wit and wisdom of Judge Judy on TV. As active as she was, she struggled physically. When we were very young, we were sent to live with relatives when she was hospitalized for cirrhosis of the liver. But I never heard her complain about her health. She just kept enjoying life as it came.
My mother only lived long enough to see one grandchild, Paul Thomas Gonnering. She could not have been prouder of this new little life. Had she survived, she would have had eleven grandchildren, nineteen great grandchildren and two great-great grandchildren.
Sadly, in March of 1974, her health took a turn for the worse. My mother was hospitalized and was being treated for liver failure. She was released to rest at home but then had to be admitted to Palms of Pasadena Hospital where she passed away two months later, just four days after Mother’s Day. "1974 was the last time I saw my dear mother. As I said goodbye that day, I didn’t realize that I would not see her again, in this life.
A few words from my own journal about my dear mother:
Tim and his mother - 1960
"I would have loved to know my mother when I was an adult. I would have loved to talk to her as friend to friend during some of the trying times of my life. My mother was a wise woman. I would love to hear more of her wit, humor and wisdom. I would have loved to tap into some of that wisdom when I was struggling as a teenager, going through a divorce, being a parent or losing a child at birth. I do know that God makes no mistakes. As he allowed things tohappen in his providence . . . "
What is the life and legacy of a Polio survivor? Family, friends, travel, love, loss, determination, goals, strength all rolled into one person. Not only do I believe that my dear mother did the best she could, but I also believe she did more then anyone could have ever expected. She encouraged us in our faith, always expected us to do the right thing and mind our own business. As I mentioned before, she did not accept rude behavior from anyone. She made her own path in a world that constantly wanted to knock her down along the way. She was more than a survivor. She proved that life could go on after having a deadly disease such as Polio.
I am thankful for the strength that my mother bestowed her five sons. As a result, her life and legacy lives on within her children and grandchildren.
By Tim Gonnering
Source for ALL photos: Tim Gonnering